Monday, April 26, 2010

change


This week is rather big for me. Before I birthed Ché I did quite a lot of freelance writing work and I loved it - especially the opportunity it provided to work in my pajamas with a cup of tea beside me. A few weeks ago I decided to call a few magazine publications and inquire about the availability of freelance work. My jaw hit the floor when the director of a successful publishing company phoned me back and offered me two days work a week (one from home) with a nice pay cheque too. Yes, I'll take it.

And it just so happens that all of the staff members are female and mothers. I don't really know how it came to be that I found a job so perfect for me and even stranger is why I'm absolutely filled with fear about starting. I go in to the office for the first time this Friday and although the editor has emailed me to say she is so excited to meet me and has some fun and interesting work for me to do I'm still concerned.

I think most of my concern lies in the actual change it has created to our family life. It's good change, I realise that, but it's still a shift in our rhythm and it's taking me a while to adjust. I suppose I'm overwhelmed by the fact that it's another hat I'm popping on my head - muma, partner, cleaner, cook, yoga teacher, birth educator, writer/journalist. Phew. It's big. What is most crazy is that I've been cleaning out cupboards because for some reason I think I'll have absolutely no time to do things like that. It's extreme I know but I feel like it needs to be done. I'm trying to simplify everything around me (including this blog - note I'm back to two-columns and successfully navigated html) in the hope that my head-space will be clearer and calmer as a result. What is most special about this change is that Fridays, when I'm in Sydney, Daniel and Ché will have their time. A day all to themselves. I'm so excited for them and can't wait to hear tales of their adventures.

I suppose this change also comes as a shock because Ché is getting so much bigger. And it's so sad. I say that with a smile on my face. That photo above was taken this morning - reading in the sun spot before heading off to his first day at Montessori prep-program. You're probably a little confused as to why he is going to Montessori when I've spoken so much about Steiner. Daniel and I have explored both philosophies and what's most important to us it that he is under the care of people that we respect and trust. The couple who run the local Montessori school are absolutely delightful and are so so beautiful with Ché. They have just built a new classroom for the 3-6 age group and are working on the 6-9 room soon. For us it seems like the best decision - knowing that Ché can learn and grow in a space that he is comfortable in. A small space for our little one.

Our little boy who played his ukelele the other day and sang these words:

"Happy boy, happy boy, happy happy boy, happy boy."


So many of you have emailed me your postal address because you want a copy of Stephanie's article. If you are interested but haven't emailed me then please do so - jodiclairewilson (at) yahoo (dot) com (dot) au

Sunday, April 25, 2010

getting our feet wet






It is so unseasonably warm for late april but we took full advantage the last three days and headed to a quiet spot on the beach. Note that we found vintage tonka (I squealed when he found it and beamed again when it was $1) which is perfect for autumn beach days where Mummy doesn't have to worry about getting pure baby skin burnt. We frolicked in between splashing on the shore and climbing over the rocks. Every day we ate fruit salad and yogurt and came home feeling warm and glowing and so thankful for beautiful days.

My absence from here was not intentional and I've got so many things to write about that I probably should make a promise to post every day for a week. But I hate to break promises and I have a feeling that other things may get in the way. We'll see. We have been autumn cleaning because we're about to resign our lease and I figure if we haven't used something for the last three years we most definitely don't need it (I'm slowly but surely changing Daniel's hoarding habits). It is such an amazing feeling to see unwanted items disappear to new homes. I like to sigh a sweet exhalation when I think of all the free space in our home (and our heads). It's rather yogic to declutter your living space because 'things' merely cause distraction...but a candle, a book and a bunch of flowers can be so inspiring in their simplicity.

In honour of my cousin's 'happy homebirth' of her second daughter today I wanted to share these links with you:

Ella's full-bellied shots are the most beautiful I've seen. She's planning a lotus birth at home and is due soon.

Rach thinks she's having a boy

Sweet local girl Rach is due any day....om shanti sukha om - peaceful & joyous birth

Thursday, April 15, 2010

this moment


{this moment}

{this moment} - A Friday ritual. A single photo - no words - capturing a moment from the week. A simple, special, extraordinary moment. A moment I want to pause, savor and remember. If you're inspired to do the same, leave a link to your 'moment' in the comments for all to find and see. (Soulemama)

Sunday, April 11, 2010

the bliss of routine


I like routine. And I don't know where my head would be if I didn't follow a rhythm every day. It has really been a savior for me as a mum. I remember back when Ché was a few months old - my head was quite seriously in the clouds, the house was always a mess and I felt completely disorganised. That may have something to do with the newborn in my life but I think it was more a result of trying to do too many things at once - and not succeeding at any of them. Daniel would often just watch me and within an hour I would have spent a few moments in every room of the house - reorganising, reshuffling, moving mess about - never actually getting anywhere. It's in my personality to float about, I get that, but when I finally began to organise in a practical way everything became so much easier to deal with. I became addicted to reading the Ikea catalogue and was convinced (still am) that storage solutions are a new mum's saving grace.

Steiner philosophy really encourages following a rhythm in the day. Doing a similar thing every morning of the week, every noon, every evening. Ritual is highly regarded too - creating ritual in your life to honour and celebrate momentous occasions. When I really thought about it it seemed like a really simple answer to my problems. To slow down, be in the moment, and have a little plan to my day. Soon after creating the said plan, I felt so much more confident in my mothering and Ché responded beautifully. Family life became blissful and my home was the cleanest it's ever been. Now Ché 'helps' with the cleaning and whenever a new mum asks me for advice I tell them to do a load of washing every day.

I was comforted to read Stephanie Dowrick's wise words in the SMH a few weekends ago. In her article titled: "The bliss of a routine life" she eloquently writes:

"...the first is to establish simple, predictable routines. By this I don't mean that tiny babies should be pushed into a rigid schedule of feeding and sleep. In fact, I think that's wrong and often damaging. But by the time the child emerges from the cocoon of infancy into toddlerhood and beyond, it is incredibly helpful to parents , and soothing and stabilising for the child, to have predictable rhythms to most day's events."

The cut-out article has been on my fridge for weeks and not a day has gone by where I haven't stopped for a few moments to remind myself of what is important in our day. As adults, Stephanie says, we tend to spend our time racing from one activity to the next, multi-tasking in order to respond to what's most urgent instead of what's most important. The children often follow in our wake.

She also talks about placing clear boundaries - something I needed to read as a mother to a toddler. Perhaps in my desire to be a fair and loving mum I have been giving Ché too many options. Wonderful Ms Dowrick continues:

"Usually offered with the best intentions, choice almost always creates tension rather than independence. Cheerfully and confident stating that it's time to get dressed, eat breakfast, have a walk, bath dinner or a story, or go to bed is realistic. It is also reassuring."

Creating a reassuring and safe life for our babes is so important. I really believe that. It became clear to Daniel and I the other day at the park. Ché was cornered in a little cubby house by 3 five-year-olds. They were yelling at him: "Chase us, chase us." We could tell that he was a little daunting by them and we knew he didn't understand what they were saying. And then he leaned his head against the wall, closed his eyes and smiled. When he opened his eyes the boys had run away.

Later that night, at dinner, Daniel asked him about what happened. What were you thinking about when you closed your eyes Ché? He responded: "Ché sleep at home, Safe in this home."

For Daniel and I, hearing that, we felt like the most proud parents in the world. That he feels safe in our family home and that he can close his eyes and be here when he feels so small in the big world.

I really want to share Stephanie's article with you but I can't find it anywhere online. If you want a copy to stick on your fridge, I would be happy to photocopy mine and send it to you. A little favour from my family to yours. Just email me your address with the promise that you will pass it on to other Mums.

Wednesday, April 7, 2010

about me (7 things) + Kreative blog award

i choose you!

Checks and Spots awarded me a Kreative Blog Award (about 6 weeks ago) and I'm only just getting around to my half of the deal - write seven things about myself. So, here goes:


1. I have a very small vocabulary considering my profession as writer/journalist. Daniel thinks this is a blessing because it means I speak everyone's language.

2. I don't have wisdom teeth - which could be the sole reason for number 1.

3. I've never been drunk. Partly due to the fact that I don't enjoy the taste of alcohol, mostly due to the fact that I start to feel queasy after a few sips. This could classify me as "cheap drunk".

4. I loathe facebook and can't understand why people feel the need to tell the world about what's on their sandwich.

5. I experienced the most crippling homesickness while alone in Paris. I sat in Notre Dame for two hours and cried. I came home a short time later.

6. Today I got all the way to the bank in the shopping centre and realised I had left my wallet at home.

7. On my second trip to the shopping centre (and this was before 10am) Ché and I got out of the car and were just about at the shops when a rather lovely young man pulled up beside me. Conversation is as follows:

Him: "Ah, excuse me?"
Me: "Yes."
Him: "Was there anyone else getting out of your car?"
Me: (slightly confused) "Um, no"
Him: "Oh, it's just that you left your car door open."
Me: (blushing, bumbling, pretty convinced I've lost my mind) "Oh, thanks. Thanks soooo much."

I walk back to my car and yes, the door is wide open. Thankfully the most valuable item in my car is a piece of leftover hot cross bun. Disappointedly, no-one had taken it.

I'm giving these lovely ones a kreative blog award: leigh, fliss, emma, rach, amber, megan andkatie

Tuesday, April 6, 2010

easter eggs cure writer's block

che kneading hot cross buns (cross bums) dough at steiner playgroup

I can already feel the easter eggs on my love handles. I ate three today because I was suffering the dreaded writer's block and sugar is the only cure. Three of Haighs which are so delectable I think I may have licked the foil wrapper - I didn't, but imagine needing the chocolate scraps that much...

We had a blissful Autumny weekend - birthday goodness followed by lazy days, a few yoga classes, bookshop perusing and the first pumpkin soup of the season. Friends visited with their gorgeous 11-week-old Evie Rose and my heart melted. Today I 'worked' from home and it felt good.

Ché is having trouble pronouncing bun and so he calls the infamous hot cross buns....cross bums. I laugh every time. I've even been caught getting them out of the pantry and asking him what they're called. Just so I can hear him say it.

Saturday, April 3, 2010

26


It was a great Friday to have a birthday and now I am officially in my mid-twenties. Feeling a little sad to have left the earlies but looking forward with bright eyes and smiles. What will 26 bring? It started pretty well with a wonderful offer from a publishing company which means I'm back in the journalism/writing seat professionally. A cosy dressing gown, some perfume, tea and books plus a few glorious gatherings with family and friends and I think I can be sure, that this year, once again, I'm a lucky girl. You can still be a girl at 26, can't you?

I also love the fact that I can eat as much chocolate as I like this weekend because it's my birthday and Easter. No-one can suggest I've eaten too much because I am honouring two celebrations.